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Snowed in and Feeling Snappish?

2/13/2014

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On days like today, we can hardly ignore the way we feel about our homes and our home lives. We may not be able to get out the front door (mine was literally blocked by a wall of snow!), and so, released from our jobs and other duties in the outside world, we stay home.

Our lives are fairly busy affairs. We have a great deal to do, whether we are working in the home, outside our homes, or both. That level of busy-ness means that most of us don't have a whole lot of time to tune into ourselves. How can we check our inner thermostats when we barely have time to read--let alone compete--our to-do lists?


But on days like today, when a lot of us had some time at home--well, time to shovel some pathways through the snow--then it really stands out for us, what our lives are like.

Home can be a wonderful place. It can be warm, nurturing, and supportive--the place where we rest and get renewed--or the opposite may be true.

As you spend time at home, draw your attention to the changes in your body. Are you feeling stressed? Angry? Lonely? How does your body reflect this? Pay attention to its subtle cues.

Let me tell you a secret:  While there may not be a magic button you can press and transform your entire existence, there is something fantastic you can do:  If you tell yourself a different story about what's happening in your life, then it gets a lot easier to make a whole new game plan.

Want an action step? Your homework is to bring clarity to your process. One of the ways yYou can do that by identifying the elements of the story you're telling yourself about your life.

1. What kind of story is it? Is it a tragedy? A mystery? A comedy?

2. Who are the characters?
Are you stuck in one place? Cast as the farcical best friend? Who are the people around you? What roles do they play? How do they support or oppose you?

3. Where is the story going?
What has yet to happen? What kind of resources and connections are coming to you?

NOW, LET'S CHANGE THE STORY.

4. What if you decided you win in the end?
What if you made up your mind that, no matter what has happened in your life so far, you're the hero? What if you knew for sure that you've already been assigned a happy ending?

That's all for this time. I wish you peace and happiness as you continue to build your life into a love st
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The Lessons in Dissatisfaction

1/21/2013

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I spent much of Friday in Hamden with a dear friend. While we had planned to spend time together, that particular location happened organically. Originally, we were thinking of choosing a place to meet for lunch that was near her work; but then, surprisingly, she took the day off. This friend works six days every week, so I was very excited when I learned we would have more time together than I originally understood.

Since this was originally a lunch date, we decided to meet at a restaurant. There are a number of fine establishments in Hamden, so we had a happy discussion as we debated where to eat. Ultimately, my friend decided on our destination. After we settled on a time, our plans were solid.

I made it to the restaurant before my friend did. When I told the host that I needed a table for two, he stated that he would be happy to give me a table when the remainder of my party arrived. Hmmm. Okay, I understand not seating one person out of a four-person party, or two people out of a five-person party...but not seating one person out of a two-person party is on the ridiculous side. Since there will only be one additional seat at the table, there is no way that the restaurant is losing anything.

When my friend arrived, the host seated us at a table. The new location made me aware that it was somewhat chilly in the main portion of the restaurant. After several minutes, I realized that I needed to put on my coat. (Is this any way to save money?)

Sadly, my entree contained very little of what I had asked for. Because I am aware that the kitchen staff is, if you will forgive the quote, made out of people, I don't expect perfection. But this overall situation might have been less disappointing if the server, who could have helped us fix these problems, had not been so scarce that I felt she was avoiding us.

Why have I told you this tale of woe?

I told you this story because there are lessons in it.

When we don't get what we want, we can come away from the experience clutching our dissatisfaction to our bosoms. That's one option. For the majority of us, at some point in our lives, it is a fallback position. (We can get stuck in this place until one of two things happens: First, we learn that there is a different option; and secondly, we decide that we want it for ourselves.)

One of the other major things that can happen when we don't get what we want is that we can look at what happened and mine some goodness from it.

So what is good about not getting anything you've asked for?

Well, there is a service issue. As a provider of personal services, I like to pay attention to the way I feel when I've received a service. It always gives me something to think about regarding ways that I can offer something better.

There is also an opportunity for me to consider ways that I might approach the people who can make the situation better. Do I find them approachable? Do I hesitate? If I do hesitate, is it because of something foreboding that is happening as part of the situation, or because of my own reticence?

And of course, there is also the opportunity to consider how what we got is better than what we might have asked for.

I have come to believe that it is always better when I look for more possibilities.

When I do intuitive work, I offer the answers to questions. But there are always blind ends when the people who are involved with an issue come up with the questions themselves. We humans can't see around corners, after all. All we can do is approach the situation from the place where we have arrived organically. Our emotional involvement causes us to see unclearly, which ensures that we can't see the whole picture.

In that case--in every case--my job is to look for the most complete information that there is. I look for, and examine, all of the possibilities, even if my client can't or won't bear to do so. I am a compassionate, but ultimately impartial, observer. By approaching every question with a manner that lets the end result be okay no matter what it is, I can find the most information.

And that is wherein I can create the most advantages for you, my client. I may be an impartial observer when I'm seeking psychic information, but I am always thinking of how to glean the best and highest results for you. That almost always means that you go home with homework assignments. These will help you to develop your mindful awareness, and take more responsibility in your own life. Often, people find that they have more clarity as a result.

Ultimately, we can always ask ourselves the question: How might this unexpected outcome empower me?

Take the time to meditate on the question. The answer might surprise you.

What do you do when you don't receive what you have asked for?

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    Tanisia Smith is a writer, a cook, a bad knitter, and a psychic, among other things. She invites you to lean deeper into the mysteries of life, love, and the divine comic tragedy of your life, at her table.

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